


I never knew it could be this way

by shanimalew



Series: Fictober 2019 [13]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Bittersweet, Drabble, Falling In Love, Fictober 2019, Idiots in Love, Light Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-14
Updated: 2019-10-14
Packaged: 2020-12-16 00:14:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21027089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shanimalew/pseuds/shanimalew
Summary: Aziraphale has always been scared of falling, as most angels. However, sometimes what you're most scared of is the best thing that could happen to you.[Fictober 2019, Day 13]





	I never knew it could be this way

**Day 13: “I never knew it could be this way.”**

Aziraphale has always been scared of falling, as most angels. Since MorningStar’s revolution, it was the best weapon to keep angels at bay. Almost everyone had seen someone fall, some even saw someone dear to them suffer that fate, but one thing was sure: nobody wanted to be the next.

And that included Aziraphale.

That’s why the angel tried his best to be diligent, obedient and efficient; although starting a conversation with the demon responsible for the corruption of the human race was not the best way to start his assignment on Earth. But that didn’t stop Aziraphale from being a loyal soldier, even when his mind started doubting the orders given him; even when his relationship with the demon Crowley started becoming more of a friendship than an acquaintanceship.

But then Armageddon happened, and Aziraphale had to come to terms with the possibility of falling, after all he had betrayed Heaven by joining forces with a demon and going against the Divine Plan.

After the initial shock due to the realisation, resignation came and he patiently waited for his fate.

Many times he was tempted to ask Crowley about his falling, but every time he stopped himself. The demon never liked talking about his past as an angel, much less about the Fall. Sometimes when drunk he had let something slip, like the fact that they fell into boiling sulfur or that he was the one who made the majority of the stars we can still see today. He was always tempted to ask for more, more information about his friends, about his life but never allowed himself to close the distance he had created between them, never dared to deepen their friendship.

Nevertheless, these days, when they spend most of their time together, enjoying the world they saved, he wants to know what is waiting for him, but he has not the courage. What he is most afraid of isn't not knowing what will happen to him, but make Crowley worry, or worst, make him feel guilty. Heaven knows how prone that demon is to self-deprecation and feeling responsible for everything happening on Earth. 

So he keeps his worries to himself, praying every night that his punishment will come soon and fast. That God will take into consideration the fact that he acted out of pure love for her creation and not for the desire to contradict her. 

However, one day, as he’s ready to close the shop for the night, mentally preparing himself for a nice and quiet night with a hot cup of cocoa and his books, he sees Crowley asleep on the couch in the back of the shop.

As he watches the demon sleep peacefully in his bookshop as if it was normal occurrence, and as he goes upstairs to find a blanket for him as if it wasn’t the first time it happened, Aziraphale realises something. Something so monumental it makes him grab the handrail breathless.

He is in love with Crowley.

And he has been for a very long time, because this warmth that invades his chest every time the demon does something tender, like falling asleep in his bookshop, is something he is very accustomed to. 

He doesn’t know when it started, if since the very beginning at the edge of Eden or later, during one of their many encounters.

He just knows that it was the easiest thing to do, like agreeing to stop Armageddon and go against everything he has ever believed in, since he didn’t even realise it was happening.

When only a month later he kisses Crowley during their now customary walk in St. James’s park, it feels as easy as eating his favourite cake. He feels like Odysseus, coming home after traveling for so many years. It feels like this, being with Crowley, kissing him deeply and feeling the warmth of his embrace was what he was born to do. His true task in this Universe: not to serve Gabriel, Heaven or God but being at the service of Love. Being one with Crowley.

“I never knew it could be this way” he says breathless, as they stop kissing.

Crowley rests his forehead against Aziraphale’s, smiling sweetly at him. Aziraphale can’t believe he had never felt Crowley’s love before, it is so deafening it’s the only thing he can hear now.

“What, angel?” he asks, whispering. He’s so close Aziraphale can study his beautiful yellow eyes, even through his thick sunglasses. 

He smiles, a small tear escaping from his eye.

“Falling”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Leave kudos and comments if you liked it!


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